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Who Needs
A Doctor When You Have Insurance
My father
used to tell me stories about some of his friends in
college. My dad used to be a bit of a wild man
before my mom came along. Him and his buddy spent
many a nights in county lock up. His friend would
sometimes use the local jail as a cheap motel
instead of continuing to walk back to his dorm room.
On this particular night a fierce storm was rolling
in and my father and his friend was enjoying their
usual night on the town. They had stopped at a few
of their favourite dive bars and had a few drinks
with fellow students. Things were going well until
someone breached the subject of the original Star
Trek being a superior film to the first Star Wars.
My father was of the opinion that Star trek,
although a quality program, had produced a mediocre
movie at best. Star Wars on the other hand was held
by him and his friends as a master piece of modern
cinema and had no equal. The situation quickly
escalated once someone brought up Dr. Who.
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It was not long before things took a turn for the
worst. Chairs and fist began to fly as unspeakable
words were spoken loudly. The fight escalated and
spilled outside and into the street. My dad and his
friends were back to back in a bare knuckle brawl
against a group of fanatical Dr. Who fans. The
original pundits of Star Trek had retreated by now
saying something about maintaining the prime
directive. A Dr. Who fan had run into an alley and
found a trash can. He returned and hurled it at my
dad who ducked as the trash can flew over his head
and in to the windshield of a parked car. The
fighting came to an abrupt stop as everyone turned
to stare at the trash can sitting in the driver's
seat of a stranger's car. A Dr. Who fan got in one
more cheap punch, but what do you expect from
someone who is willing to brawl over a British
science fiction show.
The car turned out to belong to the owner of the
bar's wife and within minutes several cops had
arrived on the scene. They explained how events
transpired and escalated from a simple disagreement
to an all out street fight. The cops were less than
sympathetic and explained how everyone should just
watch M.A.S.H. and learn to get along. This almost
caused a riot, but everything eventually calmed down
after they maced one of the Dr. Who admires.
Apparently the owner of the car had been in dispute
with her insurance company and was using a temporary insurance (which can be bought from here in the
UK) while trying to find a proper replacement.
The downside to this was it only covered liability
and not vandalism, which is how they ended up
classifying it. Everyone who fought also attended
the same college and each person, even the
pacifistic Star Trekkers, were forced to split the
bill to replace the window and repaint the scuffed
up hood.
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